Where can I learn to juggle chainsaws?
I have a court hearing tomorrow and I want to impress the judge.
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11 Responses to “Where can I learn to juggle chainsaws?”-
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In one day?
Ambitious of you. That takes balls.
Which would certainly be safer than chainsaws, but admittedly, not as impressive.
Have you considered a happy medium? Perhaps poison-tipped lawn darts?
If you insist on sticking with the chainsaw thing, I’d suggest "Stumpy’s Juggling Academy (and croissants)" in Topeka, Kansas. Stumpy can’t really teach by example, or even demonstrate, being armless as well as "ambulatorily challenged". However, he can see pretty well, as long as you’re within about three feet of him, and he’s an absolute whiz at talking you through the process. Oh, and the croissants are excellent.
One tip….when he offers you the insurance after you’ve filled out your next-of-kin information……TAKE IT.
Leatherface
Go to your local prosthetic shop and ask the owner if he knows anyone.
Great, if you bring chain saws into court, they will charge you with bring weapons into the court.
The circus.
Come on over…I’ll show you.
The Circus of Death training school in transyvania
funny I was at an armless persons convention last week and I met people looking for students to teach chainsaw juggling too, they expressed sadness it was a lost art
You should have started schooling a long time ago. Start with balls, then rings, then pins, daggers, and then chain saws. That’s the usual order it’s learned in. However, if you really feel you want to impress the judge…..you might try being polite and leave the court jester at home.
I would suggest "Lefty ‘ s School of Chainsaw Juggling and Blood Bank"
Just pick them up and try it. What have you got to lose?